The No Good, Horrible, Stinky House Guests!

Exciting times here lately. I’ve been dying to fill you all in on the HORRENDOUS house guests we had visiting. Omg…people…it was BAD! This is precisely why I didn’t blog during that time because I was occupied with cooking and cleaning up after small children. No, wasn’t talking about my twinados. I’m talking about the 30 year olds that were staying with us. Folks, this is what happens if you let your kids live at home TOO long.

Thank god for these two beauties! Best excuses to get out of everything!

These guests are people we know from my husband’s hometown in Germany. They were doing an American vacation first by going to Florida and then up to us in Michigan. Woo…Michigan…fun. Any who, we come to find out that for the first two weeks of their trip (Europeans have a lot of vacation time…ya know) they stayed at the girl’s 3rd cousin’s house directly in North Beach, Miami, FL and they spent most of their vacation on the couch and on their phones. Also, never bought a thing and expected all meals to be prepared for them. I found this out 2 days before they arrived at our home.

I’m going to cut this short by summarizing the hell:

I had to pick them up with the twins in the car who screamed the whole way because well..stranger danger and it was fucking NAP TIME! Schedules people! Focus! Found out that they were arriving on a Tuesday morning and not leaving until SUNDAY NIGHT! Christ. That’s 6 days. Of. Hell. My husband worked for most of them. So, it was just me.

Moving on…They didn’t strike up any conversation with me, didn’t help with the twins, literally sat on the couch and played with their phones. They changed baby Einstein the second I walked away with the babies to bring them to nap time. What if I was watching that people?! The Simpsons are NOT educational. They waited every night for dinner to be served to them and never once said it was good or even asked to help to prepare anything. One night the husband even prompted the topic by saying how delicious the beef stew was that I made and I did such a good job…blah blah effin blah…and as the dude swallowed his carrots I felt a spark of hope and then…”Can you turn up the tv, please?” Again, nothing.

The bathroom situation…lets just say…crapping ON the toilet seat is usually not how that works. IN THE BOWL, folks, in the bowl! And for whatever reason they waited to use the bathroom or shower whenever the babies were down for a nap. Their racket caused the babies to have 30 min naps. SAY WHAAAATTTT?!?!? Totally crazy, momma over here.

Sunday came and I was never so happy to see people leave. They literally said, “We were trying to figure out how to stay longer.” Umm no…WALK…out the door…put some pizzazz in it.  Knees to chest, bitches, KNEES TO CHEST!

They both live at home still and are very clearly treated like children living at home. I booked it the second I turned 18, what is wrong with people? Oh, I also made an entire pan of brownies and gave each of them one and went back out to cut up the rest. Literally 4 seconds later and I hear very heavy breathing behind me. They ate the entire pan of them minus 2 from the husband and I. Can you even…? I can’t. The cruelty!

So…thats just a small sampling of how my week went. All while trying to juggle my usual circus of 8 month old twinados and a very jealous labrador. It’s been a week..let me just say! The silence is a beautiful thing!

In other news: Check out this picture I found of my mom and I (on the left) and then my mom holding my little guys. I definitely have a mini me in there! But how special is it to see your mom holding your babies. It’s magical…tearing up over here! *sniff*


No martini tonight…going straight to the whiskey! *Breathe* I’ll be back on to regularly baby blogging soon! Lots to tell ya’ll!

Don’t forget to follow me on Facebook for other fun updates throughout the cray cray days!


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