Stop Comparing

Recently I saw a friend’s Facebook post about her 7 month old singleton. He was born one day before my boys, for reference.

My boys currently are long, skinny, and one has a pretty large head. They each weigh approximately 17lbs, 28″ long. Thats pretty lean…both below the 25 percentile for those stupid charts. WHICH, by the way, are based off of moms who went 40 weeks, with ONE baby. There is no chart for moms who went earlier, with multiples and what not. All of which is fairly frustrating. Maybe I should write to the CDC about their mistake.

Anywho…back to my friend’s post. Here is what I saw:

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Basically comparing kids is a no-go. Even though our kids were all born on the same day more or less, I need to stop thinking that I’m somehow lacking as a mom based on other children’s milestones.

So, he’s a bit taller….double the weight(!!)…talking…crawling…sitting up obviously…I mean…HOLD THE DAMN PHONE! Give me a second to catch up. For the record, her little guy is the most adorable little chap. Nothing against her, the baby, or her parenting.

Teeth….well at 7.5 months we are JUST starting to see some push through the gums for one guy, the other wants nothing to do with teeth. Crawling…thats a negative. Just trying to get through tummy time is a struggle. Says “Da-Da.” WTF! You’re 7 month old is talking AND has teeth. Shut it down. Right now!

It’s so hard for me not to feel inadequate. I am a new mom, severely struggling to get my post partum depression in order, and barely have time to teach my guys to sit up on their own. I am doing my best but when I see how moms with singleton babies are flourishing into these mini-geniuses, it kills me!

I realize I need to stop comparing my kids to everyone else. I am doing the very best that I can with what I have. Zero family, zero help, just me…100% of the time. I just really hope that I am not keeping my dudes from thriving just because I’m depressed and exhausted. We are all just trying to survive over here.

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And people wonder why I drink! Just keepin afloat! When the boys were little they had such horrible reflux that they vomited most of their food every feeding. I was giving them 3oz for what seemed like eternity. Just recently we have been able to increase little by little without too much spit up. (WOOHOO!!! No more stained clothes!) But I used to feel sad that I couldn’t get enough food in them and all these others babies I saw were getting double what they were at that age. It has been a struggle!

Anyone else do this? Compare your kids constantly? We just gotta stop doing that and let our little people be the best little people they can be!

Cheers!

2 thoughts on “Stop Comparing

  1. YES. THIS.

    When people ask me their age and then tell me all of the things they should be doing and they aren’t doing anyyyy of it? Or when moms with YOUNGER singletons tell me everything their kid is doing that mine arent??? COOL. Its hard not to compare, even between the two I get worried sometimes that one is behind. It’ll all even out someday, just keeping doing you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly!! Precisely why I don’t read any books about what your kid should be doing month to month. We aren’t hitting these “should be” milestones always and that’s ok! But you’re right…it will all even out eventually! Lol

      Like

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