Yesterday I went to the grocery store with the twins. I know…I’m brave. Considering they have been napping like crap and have somehow decided to be cranky ALL.DAY.LONG. I had to get more formula and my main goal was to get medicine for this sickness I’ve contracted (which didn’t end up happening due to cranky babies.)
Twin Moms know we get a lot of comments when we are out and about like we are a freak show so getting out of the house is difficult in many aspects.
Let’s play a game. Guess what was said the most during one of our first 3 musketeers trip to the grocery store. (Picture me pushing a double stroller and pulling cart behind me.)
A. Are they twins? B. They are so sweet!
C. You have your hands full! D. Oh a boy and a girl?
Before I tell you the answer I think it’s important to address these comments. If you are someone with half a brain…DON’T SAY THESE! EVER!!! (with the exception of “C”.) I hate these comments. They are in a way rude and I get that people are just trying to make conversation but maybe they could TRY to be a bit more complimentary!
Twins? No, the hospital had a buy one, get one free deal. I picked the cutest one I could find in the nursery.
Oh my hands are full? Then why don’t you just offer to give me a hand, you whack?!
A boy and a girl? Did the blue blanket give it away?
So to answer the above question…I am bombarded with the “hands full” comment. I get the others too but this one REALLY drives me insane. In one trip I counted lucky number 13 people who said that to me. Seriously, people? Do you want me to throw this gallon of milk at your face?
So, back to yesterday. I somehow made it through the whole store without a comment. Well, not directly, but I did hear the “ohhh look!” and see many people do a double take. (ha…double take. Get it?!) And then I arrive at the bananas and this older lady literally pushes her cart in front of the stroller to stop me in my tracks. She wasn’t being malicious however she did want to get my attention.
“You need a valet! Or a maid!” I looked at her with the devil in my eyes and very calmly said, “No I don’t. I do it all myself.”
This comment just threw me! Actually, Lady, what I need is for you to shut your mouth when you’re talking to me! Do I look stressed out? Do I look like I can’t handle life without help? A maid? Do I look dirty? How about saying I look like a superwoman because that’s how I feel pushing a double stroller and pulling a full cart behind me. BITE ME, you sloth!
This, people, is exactly why I drink. Join me for a slurp, will ya?